IVF

Im Very Freakedout



I know I've posted some IVF stuff before, but I was apprehensive to keep posting about it. I've had so many disappointments throughout this journey, I wasn't sure if this time doesn't work if I really wanted to share that with everyone. But, the more people I have that know what is going on that can wish, hope, and pray for me the better; in my opinion! Besides, those that care would find out anyway! There are people I love dearly who read this that I don't get to talk to often, so this is my way of keeping you informed. If you have any questions, please ask me!

Ok, so this is what's going on. The Lupron at the top left is making my hormones shut down so I will not ovulate (which I don't normally do anyway, but just to be sure). I have been on it since Dec. 22, giving myself 20 unit injections every night. I went for a baseline ultrasound on Monday and they said it did what it was supposed to do and that my ovaries looked good, so my dose was lowered to 5 units a night.

Beginning this Sunday, I will add 2 more injections. I will start 150 units of the Bravelle and Menopur, which are intended to make my follicles (eggs) grow big. I will still take the Lupron to make sure that while these are growing, they do not go anywhere. Also, I will start a med to make my uterine lining thicken to make it ready for pregnancy. Bill and I will both start antibiotics at this time to prevent any infection so the process will not be hampered by sickness!

I will go to Evansville on Thursday the 14th for a blood draw to test my estrogen. Hopefully it will be going back up. Sadly, that is the only thing I will be making the 4 hour round trip there for. 5 minutes of waiting to have my blood drawn! But, there isn't a lab in all of Southern Illinois that will draw and have the results back the same day....oy. Depending on the numbers, my doc will either increase, decrease, or keep the same dosage of med.

I will go back on the 16th and the 18th for ultrasounds to measure my ovaries/eggs. Frequent scans are needed to prevent ovarian hyperstimulation. If the medicine causes them to get too big, they could burst, resulting in serious business....but we won't go too far into that!

Keep in mind that while these eggs are growing, they are meant to not go anywhere, so when they are ready (to be decided by doc) I will be given a shot of Novarel, which is a "trigger" shot to make me ovulate. Within 36 hours of that shot, I will go back for egg retrieval. This date is not decided yet, but will be approximately around the 22nd. Retrieval will take approx 30 minutes and I will be sedated, then will be in recovery for 1-2 hours. As soon as eggs are retrieved, they are immediately taken to the lab to be with Bill's "sample" (how romantic, right?). We will be called the next day to know the fertilization rates.

3-5 days after this, I will go back for a transfer. We won't know how many we will implant until we discuss it with the doc. I don't know how long transfer takes, but I will be in recovery for about 1 hour.

Somewhere in the mess of all of this, I will also get shots of progesterone and I will have prednisone to take.
Now comes the toughest part. The 2 week wait! It will make me crazy!!! I'm thinking we will know something by the 2nd week of Feb. Of course all of this depends on everything else playing out like it should, which I have came to doubt, but I am trying to be optimistic.

So, there you have it! I will try to update progress, as long as there is some! Please keep Bill and I in your thoughts for all of this. It is overwhelming and is consuming my thoughts. My heart aches for nothing more than to be a mother to my own child. Let's hope that the new year will bring me what I long for!

Follow up from previous post...

 Clockwise L to R....

We got dad a Nintendo DS for Christmas....I think he likes it!

Erin, Amy, Me, and Tiffani at our T'Ville Christmas.  We were probably gossiping!

Grace watching her video Santa sent her that was very personalized.  She loved it!

Raymond, Bill, and Shawn....they are way cool!

Grace and Ava playing

Chace thinks Aunt Lisa is hilarious!

MaKenzie, Miki, Katelyn, Me, and Grace at our final Christmas!

Katelyn may be about 20 years (minus a few) younger than Bill, but she is almost as tall.  I feel like a shrimp around these people.  Ok, maybe I feel that way around most people anyway, but they all tower over me!

Bill with his sister and his dad

I wrapped Katie and MaK's gift card in about 50 Wal Mart sacks before I wrapped them, it was funny!  It didn't take them as long as I thought it would.  I'm gonna have to rethink my whole strategy next year!

Bill, Miki, and Katie

Christmas at a glance....

A very small glance! We had such a big, long, fun, exhausting, wonderful, happy, merry Christmas! I have tons of pictures, but not a lot of time to pick and choose what to share. So, here is a little glance!



Clockwise from top left:

Grace closing her eyes because she was too excited to see what big thing Santa had brought her.

Of the hundreds of dollars in toys that she received, she was most excited about the cheapo wand that came in the magic kit that Aunt Patty got her. Hopefully, she will practice magic enough that I won't have to do housework again, ever.

Since Grace won't ever be at our house on Christmas day, and I'm afraid "Santa" days will be drawing to a close, she made PB&J and left it out for Santa the night before Christmas Eve in hopes that he would make an exception for her and come a day early. Guess what? He did!

I think this is the ONLY picture I have of all 3 of us from all of Christmas. I had even said that at some point I was going to make sure I got someone to take a picture of us because everything always gets so busy that we forget! Guess what? I forgot. But, at least I remembered to set the camera up and take our own. So what if I'm in my work clothes and the dogs had to get their butts in the picture?!

Me, Amy, and Raymond AKA My best friends!

Uncle Jerome, Dad, and the Grandkids. Next year there will be a couple more to add to the picture....hopefully one will be mine!

All the grandkids with Santa! It was really funny because Chace was excited, Libby was scared, Grace was old enough to know better (at least that it was Bobby), and Baylee couldn't care less!

....Come to think of it, I need to make another collage cause we did a lot more at Christmas than just this! More to come!

My sister's friend Jayma brought her twins over for a christmas picture. It was very last minute, but we got a couple of good pictures:



Aren't they cute? They were here less than an hour and I'm already worrying. These boys are 10 months old now and they are crawling and moving like crazy. WHAT am I gonna do if I end up with more than that?! I know, I know....I'll make it! But, I'm used to having only one baby around!

Christmas is just around the corner and I can't wait! I have almost everything done and that is relieving! I can't wait to spend time with my family and have a few extra days off of work! Lots of pictures to come I'm sure! Have a good night!

WANTED!

Following is an ad posted by Grace.  It was a class project, I believe to go along with a story they were reading.

WANTED  Best Friend

1.  Must love Forwerls!   

2.  Must love DS gams
     Maroieo Broses!

3.  Love hores!    *settle down, I know you're really getting a kick out of this by now!

See Gracie Immediately!!!!!


OK, now the really funny thing about this to me is that the girl can spell "immediately", but struggled with "horses".  C'mon....really?  Well, I got a smile out of it and this is definitely going in the keep folder!

Following is a picture that needs a little explanation.  Since Grace started 2nd grade, she has been sweet on a little boy in her class named Ethan.  When she was in K & 1, she had a different boyfriend every day, but this year she only likes Ethan.  We don't want her to be "in love" (she IS only 8), but it is funny to see her like a boy because he is nice to her.  Well, Ethan was the only boy she wanted to invite to her birthday party (besides family) and he got to come.  He stood up front with her while she opened her presents and blew out her candles.  When we were Christmas shopping, she wanted to buy Ethan a present.  Help me out here, what is acceptable to buy a 2nd grade "boyfriend"?  (By the way, we don't let her call him her "Boyfriend"....he's a friend.  She says "Yah right!" Anyway, it makes her daddy feel better!)  So, she settled on some Flix Trix, saying she knows he likes them.  Soooo, when I picked her up at school Thursday, I stopped to talk to Ethan's mom to tell her we had a little gift for him.  She then shows me the gift they got for Grace because Ethan wanted her to bring it so Grace could get it that day to take home.  It was a build a bear!  I was shocked!  She said that was what he wanted to get her.  So, he asked her what her favorite animal was and Grace had told him an otter.  What the heck?!  An OTTER?!  She loved them at the zoo this summer, so I guess that's why....  So, E's mom was worried they wouldn't find an otter....guess what?  They did!  He dressed it as Mrs. Claus and named it Olivia.  When the kids came out of school, he gave it to her; she was so embarassed!  When we got in the car, she was smiling so big and kept talking about how she couldn't believe he got that for her.  The whole time she was here, she kept hold of that thing and took care of it like it were a real baby!

If you're still following after that long-winded story, here's a pic of Grace and Olivia the Otter!     

Time Flies...

 When you're having fun!  Look at these 2 cuties and how they've changed!  We are enjoying the christmas season and all it has to offer!  I have pleasantly surprised myself and have gotten 98.5% of my shopping done.  It feels so good to not have the stress of shopping on Dec 23rd to worry about!  All the presents I have are wrapped, minus those from Santa, my cards are mailed out, food is planned, and the lights are glowing bright on my tree.



 Plans are coming along for my IVF.  I received all of my medicine in the mail the other day and was almost overwhelmed.  There's a ton of it!  Lots and lots of needles, pills, vials, and such.  I thought the last injections I had were a bunch!  That was nothing! I'd like to ask you to keep me in your thoughts as we go through this.  If you pray, please pray for us.  If you wish, please wish for us.  If you cross your fingers....well, you get the picture!  This has been the most emotionally draining thing I have ever been through.  I will keep you updated as we go on.

I sit here and type as floors need to be swept, dishes need to be done, and laundry calls my name.  In the living room there is a husband looking for some attention, so I must go!  Have a good night and enjoy what is left of the Christmas season because time flies!

Man, one post in alll of November, that's awful! I don't even think I could call myself a blogger!

My next favorite time of the year is already here! We've gotten our tree and inside decorations up, the outside lights are done, and the Christmas CD is in the player. It's Christmas time!! Before I get too far into that though, here are some pics from Thanksgiving:



Grace brought her Guess Who game and we declared Amy the all time champ. Aunt Patty tried teaching Chace how to make a poker face, dad cooked an excellent turkey, and Grace gnawed on a turkey leg for an hour. Seriously....she would carry it around chewing on it, lay her plate down and come get it later! Gross!

I had typed a sheet of paper for everyone with their name at the top with "I am thankful for you because" under it. We were to pass the papers around and list a reason why we were thankful for them. My family doesn't talk feelings well, so I wondered how much of a challenge this would be. Not everyone wrote on them, but most did and at the end of the night, you got your paper back to take home and read. I was so glad I did this. My paper made me cry with the thoughtful words (though I tend to be a cry baby anyway), but the sweetest thing was Grace. I read hers to her when we got home and she started crying (happy) because she was so touched by what Amy had said to her. We may know we are thankful for someone, but telling that person can mean so much.

I had a lot to be thankful for this Thanksgiving. I have groceries in my cabinets and heat in my home. I have a comfortable bed and clothes on my back. I have a car, a job, and a little bit of talent to pursue what I love to do. I have a wonderful husband and daughter who love me unconditionally. I have 4 dogs who don't care if I look like crap or say the wrong thing, as long as I give 'em a scratch on the head. We can all find things that bring us down or that we are not happy about. But, look a little further and you will find a mountain of things to be thankful for. And not just on Thanksgiving, but everyday.