It was ::not me:: who went to Kroger this morning in the shirt I wore for pajamas last night! I would never leave the house in anything but freshly laundered articles of clothing!
It was ::not me:: who just last night (wearing the same shirt mentioned above) had to go take some movies back and threw a jacket on and zipped it up because I didn't want to put a bra on. I'd never, ever leave the house without a bra!!!
It was ::not me:: who spent 10 minutes swinging on Chace and Miles' swing set yesterday {by myself} while they played in the sand box. I'm much too big to be playing on children's play equipment!
It was ::not me:: who cried and left my dad's without saying anything the other day because I felt like he was yelling at me in front of a delivery guy about moving my car [though it was his normal tone of voice when he's in "work mode"]. I'm much too old to be offended by a harsh tone from my father and I'd never cry about it!
It was ::not me:: who boo hoo'd watching a movie last night about people having babies. [What to Expect When You're Expecting]. I'd know what a movie like that would do to me and I'd never torture myself by watching it! It was a pretty good movie!
It was ::not me:: who got scared when someone knocked on the door at 10:30 pm the other night while I was watching tv and chace was sleeping on the bean bag. It was also ::definitely not me:: who scooped him up and ran him to my bedroom and threw him in the bed with Bill so I could go answer the door -- only to find out it was a pizza delivery girl looking for the address 2 houses away.
It was surely ::not me:: who drug out alllll of my fall/halloween decorations Saturday and left them sitting in the living room by the front door. I would never drag out a mess and not finish it right away!
So, what about you? Care to share some of your "not me" moments? I'd love to hear that I'm not the only unperfect person out there! :) Have a wonderful Monday!
our story of life, love, and imperfect happiness while raising a couple of kids! We are complete!
Monday, September 24, 2012
Thursday, September 20, 2012
Little bit of a Debbie Downer.
My Uncle Jim got some good news and some not so good news. The good news is that his tumor has shrunk from 5.5 to 2.5. Bad news is that it is spreading. Still praying for a miracle. People say they happen every day....
Several of my friends have commented on facebook on a page for a little 13 year old boy with cancer. I don't know them at all, but read the page and I broke down. He is ready to pass and there was an interview with his mother talking about how they've told him it's ok to go if God tells him to. I.cannot.imagine.the.pain. I have been weeping for 15 minutes for this little boy and his family. Hoping he finds his miracle also....
We got an email from our case worker that it is time for our monitoring visit. It is no big deal, but I don't want to do it. Of course we will because we have to...but I still don't want to; sometimes I just want to give up. I won't give up, but it's what I feel like doing sometimes. I feel like we're never going to get a baby and that I'm just wasting time worrying, wondering, and crying. What in the heck have I done to deserve this wait? Aghhhhh.
I have been in a pretty foul mood lately. I get mad at Bill for the stupidest things. Sometimes he pronounces a word wrong and it gets on my nerves. If he doesn't have the right expression when I tell him something then I think he's mad....then I get mad....then he gets mad that I'm mad even when he wasn't mad. See how stupid it is?! Ugh.
So, how's that for being a Debbie Downer?! I'll think of a better post for tomorrow....but for now, I'm going to wallow in my own self pity and go to bed. Tomorrow is a new day!
Several of my friends have commented on facebook on a page for a little 13 year old boy with cancer. I don't know them at all, but read the page and I broke down. He is ready to pass and there was an interview with his mother talking about how they've told him it's ok to go if God tells him to. I.cannot.imagine.the.pain. I have been weeping for 15 minutes for this little boy and his family. Hoping he finds his miracle also....
We got an email from our case worker that it is time for our monitoring visit. It is no big deal, but I don't want to do it. Of course we will because we have to...but I still don't want to; sometimes I just want to give up. I won't give up, but it's what I feel like doing sometimes. I feel like we're never going to get a baby and that I'm just wasting time worrying, wondering, and crying. What in the heck have I done to deserve this wait? Aghhhhh.
I have been in a pretty foul mood lately. I get mad at Bill for the stupidest things. Sometimes he pronounces a word wrong and it gets on my nerves. If he doesn't have the right expression when I tell him something then I think he's mad....then I get mad....then he gets mad that I'm mad even when he wasn't mad. See how stupid it is?! Ugh.
So, how's that for being a Debbie Downer?! I'll think of a better post for tomorrow....but for now, I'm going to wallow in my own self pity and go to bed. Tomorrow is a new day!
Sunday, September 16, 2012
Weekend visitor....
So, if you read my last post, you know that my Uncle Jim is very sick. He and his family came up for a quick trip this weekend. I was so nervous that he would look so sick already and that the visit would be filled with awkward moments, like "I know you're sick but I don't know what to say" moments. It was anything but that....and for that I am so thankful.
Being sick sure didn't affect Uncle Jim's un-punctuality. He was as late as ever. Kidding, kidding! Sort of. :) I thought he was coming to the parade with us and he showed up a few hours later. He had a good excuse, though...he was napping. :) This is something I have always made fun of him for (and not always behind his back...haha).
Being sick also did not affect his Grandpa-Kopec-like story telling. A short story will take forever to tell.
And ever.
And ever.
And then a little bit longer.
But, I have never been happier to hang onto every word he said!
I promise I am not being mean by these little digs at him! :) I love you Uncle Jim!
When hefinally arrived, we showed him and Aunt Ruth the shop (she had never been there) and headed to dad's to cook on the grill. We visited, ate, laughed, had a campfire, joked, and had fun. I took lots of pictures but I always do that anyway. ;) It was just like normal. Except he is sick.
To me, there was a little aura(?) that hung in the air. We all knew the filthy, unwelcomed guest was staking residence inside him, and cursed it with unspoken words. Since things were so "normal" I didn't want to talk about the cancer as not to tarnish the visit. But, it was still there. I asked how he was feeling a few times and he assured he was ok, a little worn out, but doing ok. I talked with Aunt Ruth a little bit about how she felt, but I didn't want to pry. I can't even imagine.
I did not cry there. I am known as a bit of a cry baby 'round these parts - in every sense of the word, but I kept it together. Since he looks great and acts the same old Uncle Jim, it was easier. When I do cry about it, it's when I think of the future. I don't want him to go through this. I don't want Aunt Ruth and Shawn to go through this. I want him to be here when I finally get a baby. What a miracle that would be. Miracles happen every day....let's hope and pray for his! And there were the waterworks. Excuse me.
Ok, let's end this with some pictures! Pictures make everything better. I am loving this pic of me and Uncle Jim. Then there's Chace and him sitting around the fire talking about monsters, a happy, happy family, Amy and a silly Uncle Jim face, and my dad and his siblings.
Oh, snap! Looks like I've ended this just in time to catch some Real Housewives of NJ! Toodles!
Being sick sure didn't affect Uncle Jim's un-punctuality. He was as late as ever. Kidding, kidding! Sort of. :) I thought he was coming to the parade with us and he showed up a few hours later. He had a good excuse, though...he was napping. :) This is something I have always made fun of him for (and not always behind his back...haha).
Being sick also did not affect his Grandpa-Kopec-like story telling. A short story will take forever to tell.
And ever.
And ever.
And then a little bit longer.
But, I have never been happier to hang onto every word he said!
I promise I am not being mean by these little digs at him! :) I love you Uncle Jim!
When he
To me, there was a little aura(?) that hung in the air. We all knew the filthy, unwelcomed guest was staking residence inside him, and cursed it with unspoken words. Since things were so "normal" I didn't want to talk about the cancer as not to tarnish the visit. But, it was still there. I asked how he was feeling a few times and he assured he was ok, a little worn out, but doing ok. I talked with Aunt Ruth a little bit about how she felt, but I didn't want to pry. I can't even imagine.
I did not cry there. I am known as a bit of a cry baby 'round these parts - in every sense of the word, but I kept it together. Since he looks great and acts the same old Uncle Jim, it was easier. When I do cry about it, it's when I think of the future. I don't want him to go through this. I don't want Aunt Ruth and Shawn to go through this. I want him to be here when I finally get a baby. What a miracle that would be. Miracles happen every day....let's hope and pray for his! And there were the waterworks. Excuse me.
Ok, let's end this with some pictures! Pictures make everything better. I am loving this pic of me and Uncle Jim. Then there's Chace and him sitting around the fire talking about monsters, a happy, happy family, Amy and a silly Uncle Jim face, and my dad and his siblings.
Oh, snap! Looks like I've ended this just in time to catch some Real Housewives of NJ! Toodles!
Sunday, September 9, 2012
Ten for Today
1. I don't ask for prayers very often. BUT, our family could sure use some right now. My Uncle Jim has been diagnosed with terminal anaplastic thyroid carcinoma. Cancer. The word makes me sick. I've never had to deal with someone I know closely having cancer. This particular cancer has a very low survival rate and progresses rapidly. There is no treatment. He will do radiation treatments to keep it at bay, but they will not cure it. He is coming to visit this weekend (they live a few hours away) and I hope I can keep it together. My mind is racing trying to think of things I want to say. If you would, please say a prayer for him, my Aunt Ruth, and cousin Shawn. They have a very tough road ahead.
2. I feel awkward posting anything else on this after #1, but I know Uncle Jim reads my blog sometimes and would enjoy reading other tid bits of my amazing wit!
3. This is my last week of work (for the Doctor anyway). I am thankful to have had such wonderful bosses over the last few years. I can honestly say that no one has doted on me as much as they have. I believe that I am a good worker, and they have never had a problem telling me that. Makes you feel really good that people appreciate what you do. I will miss that and hope that my new boss will appreciate the same. Ahem, Pam/Dad. haha
4. Grace turned 11 last week and we had an awesome week celebrating her birthday. Yes, a whole week! :) We had a family party one week before since it's Bill's birthday that week too, then a slumber party a few days later, and wrapped it up celebrating just the three of us on her actual birthday. She is a very fortunate little girl and I am so happy that she knows that! We will be delivering stuff to the local children's shelter that she collected in lieu of birthday gifts from her friends (though they were sweet friends and still brought some things for Grace herself!). Here's the birthday girl::
5. Grace was telling me about a sub teacher at her school the other day and she said she had botox several times. I asked her how she knew that - she told me because she looks like one of those ladies on those shows I always watch. I'm assuming she's talking about The Real Housewives and not The Office. You think?! hahaha
6. If you're broke, don't go to the bar all the time. That costs a lot of money.
7. I thought someone broke in our house the other night while we were laying in bed. I saw a light that I could have sworn was a flash light in the kitchen and I heard "someone" stumbling around. I shook Bill and woke him up and he assured me it was the dogs. He quickly fell back to sleep while I laid with my eyes bugged open staring out the bedroom door for an eternity. Once I was convinced no one was there, I started to drift off - and then I heard a scraping noise. My eyes flew open and I almost screamed seeing something coming in the bedroom door. It was a BALLOON from Grace's birthday!! Good thing I used the bathroom right before bed, I think we could have had a real mess on our hands. I've GOT to quit watching scary movies!
8. Bill's grandma passed away last week after a massive stroke. She had a great life and it was obvious she touched her grandkids' lives. Since there are only 6 grandkids and 3 of them live farther away, it was nice for them to see each other and remember memories of her. Bill's Aunt let Grace go through her great grandma's jewelry and pick some things out. She showed me a hair comb that she picked out and informed me that she wants to wear it on her wedding day. Planning ahead, that's my girl!
9. I am loving my kindle fire I got for my birthday! I can't wait for Christmas so I can ask for gift cards so I can buy more books! I have a problem buying books myself when I could just go to the library! Woe is me. :)
10. Ending this because I am tired. Found a new blog post title I like today, "If you really know me"....think I may try that one in the future.....stay tuned!
2. I feel awkward posting anything else on this after #1, but I know Uncle Jim reads my blog sometimes and would enjoy reading other tid bits of my amazing wit!
3. This is my last week of work (for the Doctor anyway). I am thankful to have had such wonderful bosses over the last few years. I can honestly say that no one has doted on me as much as they have. I believe that I am a good worker, and they have never had a problem telling me that. Makes you feel really good that people appreciate what you do. I will miss that and hope that my new boss will appreciate the same. Ahem, Pam/Dad. haha
4. Grace turned 11 last week and we had an awesome week celebrating her birthday. Yes, a whole week! :) We had a family party one week before since it's Bill's birthday that week too, then a slumber party a few days later, and wrapped it up celebrating just the three of us on her actual birthday. She is a very fortunate little girl and I am so happy that she knows that! We will be delivering stuff to the local children's shelter that she collected in lieu of birthday gifts from her friends (though they were sweet friends and still brought some things for Grace herself!). Here's the birthday girl::
6. If you're broke, don't go to the bar all the time. That costs a lot of money.
7. I thought someone broke in our house the other night while we were laying in bed. I saw a light that I could have sworn was a flash light in the kitchen and I heard "someone" stumbling around. I shook Bill and woke him up and he assured me it was the dogs. He quickly fell back to sleep while I laid with my eyes bugged open staring out the bedroom door for an eternity. Once I was convinced no one was there, I started to drift off - and then I heard a scraping noise. My eyes flew open and I almost screamed seeing something coming in the bedroom door. It was a BALLOON from Grace's birthday!! Good thing I used the bathroom right before bed, I think we could have had a real mess on our hands. I've GOT to quit watching scary movies!
8. Bill's grandma passed away last week after a massive stroke. She had a great life and it was obvious she touched her grandkids' lives. Since there are only 6 grandkids and 3 of them live farther away, it was nice for them to see each other and remember memories of her. Bill's Aunt let Grace go through her great grandma's jewelry and pick some things out. She showed me a hair comb that she picked out and informed me that she wants to wear it on her wedding day. Planning ahead, that's my girl!
9. I am loving my kindle fire I got for my birthday! I can't wait for Christmas so I can ask for gift cards so I can buy more books! I have a problem buying books myself when I could just go to the library! Woe is me. :)
10. Ending this because I am tired. Found a new blog post title I like today, "If you really know me"....think I may try that one in the future.....stay tuned!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)