Little bit of a Debbie Downer.

My Uncle Jim got some good news and some not so good news.  The good news is that his tumor has shrunk from 5.5 to 2.5.  Bad news is that it is spreading.  Still praying for a miracle.  People say they happen every day....

Several of my friends have commented on facebook on a page for a little 13 year old boy with cancer.  I don't know them at all, but read the page and I broke down.  He is ready to pass and there was an interview with his mother talking about how they've told him it's ok to go if God tells him to.  I.cannot.imagine.the.pain.  I have been weeping for 15 minutes for this little boy and his family.  Hoping he finds his miracle also.... 

We got an email from our case worker that it is time for our monitoring visit.  It is no big deal, but I don't want to do it.  Of course we will because we have to...but I still don't want to; sometimes I just want to give up.  I won't give up, but it's what I feel like doing sometimes.  I feel like we're never going to get a baby and that I'm just wasting time worrying, wondering, and crying.  What in the heck have I done to deserve this wait?  Aghhhhh.

I have been in a pretty foul mood lately.  I get mad at Bill for the stupidest things.  Sometimes he pronounces a word wrong and it gets on my nerves.  If he doesn't have the right expression when I tell him something then I think he's mad....then I get mad....then he gets mad that I'm mad even when he wasn't mad.  See how stupid it is?!  Ugh.

So, how's that for being a Debbie Downer?!  I'll think of a better post for tomorrow....but for now, I'm going to wallow in my own self pity and go to bed.  Tomorrow is a new day!